Is Poor Emotional Intelligence Preventing You From Gaining More Business?

June 13, 2014

By Colleen Stanley, SalesLeadership Inc.

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You’ve preached the importance of consistent prospecting and business development to your sales team. All heads nod up and down in agreement.

You’ve dedicated a portion of each sales meeting to teaching your team new skills and strategies for opening up opportunities. Key performance metrics have been determined and are being tracked.

So with all this time and attention, why are so many sales managers and CEOs still complaining that there aren’t enough new opportunities coming through the door?

Most sales organizations try to fix selling challenges by throwing more hard sales skills training at the problem. In some cases, this might just be the right fix. However, in many situations, an empty sales pipeline often is caused by poor emotional intelligence (EI) skills.

Jack Mayer and Peter Salovey, who are leading researchers on EI skills, define EI as, “The subset of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and actions.”

The most common complaints from sales managers and CEOs are:
1. The sales team isn’t consistently prospecting. They’re good one week, then lose their momentum and shift into account-management mode.
2. Prospecting efforts are producing only small deals and transactions. The big opportunities are lost to the competition.

Let’s examine these prospecting issues to learn how EI skills can positively or negatively affect lead-generation efforts and results.

1. Sporadic prospecting.

Sporadic prospecting efforts usually happen when a salesperson hasn’t developed the EI skill of delayed gratification, which is the ability to put in the work before achieving the reward. Salespeople who haven’t developed this skill get frustrated easily if they don’t get sales results quickly. For example, they might cold call, email, or attend networking events for two weeks. If no appointments are set, they throw in the towel and start surfing the Internet.

When trying to build a personal network, they’re not willing to put in the time and effort needed to build alliance partners. They meet a potential partner for breakfast and then expect him to hand over his Rolodex. Relationships are built over time, and instant-gratification salespeople are reluctant to invest energy.

Instant-gratification salespeople are often lousy at time management. They don’t plan their weeks and months very well because planning, well, it takes time and thought. They subscribe to the wing-it school of sales and show up at the office on Monday morning with no clue of how they’re going to spend their week. There’s no plan of action other than where they’re going to get their next cup of coffee.

The salesperson with delayed-gratification skills will put in the time to carefully map out a pursuit strategy, identifying the opportunities and the buying influences within each prospect account. He or she creates a customized approach for each meeting and plans thoughtful questions and value propositions that will resonate with each individual buyer.

The instant-gratification salesperson, on the other hand, shows up with a generic, one-size-fits-all approach that rarely results in a second meeting.

2. Small deals.

The need for instant gratification also affects deal size. Smaller transactions take less time to close, maybe three to six months. Larger deals, on the other hand, can take anywhere from nine months to two years to close. The instant-gratification salesperson quickly grows tired of the pursuit and chases low-hanging fruit.

Large deals also involve meetings with a variety of buyers. This means that a salesperson must be good at reading and relating to a variety of people, which requires the EI skill of empathy. It’s the ability to tune in and understand what others are thinking and feeling.

Empathetic salespeople recognize that each buyer has a different set of pains, a different set of needs, a different story. They’re quick to listen and slow to offer a solution. Empathetic salespeople ask more and better questions. As a result, they win business because they offer solutions that align perfectly with each buyer’s pain.

No, you don’t need to stop teaching hard sales skills, such as email prospecting, cold calling, referral training, and LinkedIn strategies. Instead, add soft-skills training to your program. This holistic approach to sales will help you better diagnose and fix your problems and improve your business development efforts. Soft skills do produce hard sales results.

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Colleen Stanley is founder and president of SalesLeadership Inc., a business development consulting firm specializing in sales and sales management training. The company provides programs in prospecting, consultative sales training, emotional intelligence development, and leadership training for sales managers. Colleen is the author of Emotional Intelligence for Sales Success and Growing Great Sales Teams. Reach her at 303.708.1128 or visit

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How the EQ-i 2.0 Assessment Can Be Used in Conjunction with the DISC Behavioral

May 15, 2014

By Judy Suiter, Competitive Edge Inc.

As a consultant certified to train and administer both DISC behavioral and the MHS, Inc. emotional intelligence assessments, I am often asked why I choose to use both. The answer is fairly simple – the two assessments measure different aspects of a person and the more awareness a person has on how and why they do things, the more control they can exhibit in order to choose effective actions. The purpose of this paper is to evaluate how the EQ-i 2.0 can be used in conjunction with the DISC Behavioral Model and how it can further validate the results of both assessments.

The DISC Behavioral Model is a self-report assessment measuring the following behaviors:

1. Dominance: How a person handles problems and challenges
2. Influence: How a person tries to influence others to their point of view
3. Steadiness: How a person paces themselves and reacts to change
4. Compliance: How a person responds to rules and regulations set by others

The DISC Model also measures a person’s emotions. The emotions associated with the four factors are as follows:

1. Dominance: Anger
2. Influence: Optimism
3. Steadiness: Empathy
4. Compliance: Fear

The EQ-i 2.0 is a self-report assessment measuring five specific factors of a person’s emotional and social functioning in the following:

1. Self-perception: Understanding your emotions
2. Self-expression: Expressing your emotions
3. Interpersonal Relationships: Developing and maintaining relationships
4. Decision Making: Using emotions to make better decisions
5. Stress Management: Coping with challenges

The DISC Model is a descriptive model and the EQ-I 2.0 is a prescriptive model. The DISC Model describes a person’s behavior and emotions so they can better understand themselves and others. The EQ-i 2.0 offers a person significant insight into how they can modify their behavior and emotions to function better.
If a person’s DISC assessment results reveal, for example, a high score on the Dominance scale, that score tells you how this person reacts to problems and challenges. A person’s EQ-i 2.0 assessment results on the Decision Making scale and the specific Problem Solving Subscale will reveal not only that the person likes problems and challenges, but how in tune they are at recognizing the emotions involved in the decision making and problem solving process. High scores on that specific scale and subscale would indicate they would be able to use their natural style to make better decisions because they have a high level of problem solving skills.

We also know that people with a high Dominance style are quick to show anger. By looking at their score on the EQ-i 2.0 Impulse Control Subscale, one would be able to determine whether the person is likely to be able to control their natural emotion of anger. In addition, the Self-Expression Composite Scale, specifically the Emotional Expression Subscale, could give the consultant insight into how constructively this person would express their emotions, especially anger. The DISC Dominance scale measures the person’s need for Independence, which is a factor in the EQ-i 2.0 report that could give more insight into how that person could best achieve a sense of independence.

The Influence Factor measures a person’s natural ability to display optimism versus pessimism and if we know their Stress Management Score, specifically, their Optimism Subscale results, we could predict how much this person’s high “I” behavior is going to contribute to their resiliency, even in the face of highly stressful events.

The EQ-i 2.0 is going to tell us what level of Emotional Self Awareness a person thinks they have and if that scale is high, it could indicate how accurate their DISC assessment results are, since DISC measures a person’s emotions, as well as behavior. If they had a low Emotional Self Awareness score, we might take a more discerning look at the results of their DISC scores.

We could also look at the Interpersonal Composite Scale and specifically the Empathy Subscale and compare the person’s results on the Steadiness Factor of the DISC Model. The DISC assessment indicates people with high “S” display high empathy and people with low “S” will struggle with displaying empathy, unless they score high on the Empathy Subscale on the EQ-i 2.0 assessment.

The results from the EQ-i 2.0 report can also give a consultant some specifics to explore regarding the person’s ability to see things as they are by looking at the Reality Subscale and comparing it to the person’s “C” factor on their DISC report, since high “C” individuals tend to be the most objective of all the behavioral styles. Another Subscale that could be examined is a potential inverse relationship between a high “C” behavioral style and the EQ-i 2.0 Flexibility Subscale, since individuals with a high “C” behavioral style may be challenged to exhibit high flexibility.

This paper is not intended to be a total comparison and correlation between these two assessments, but rather to examine some of the reasons a person might want to take both assessments to gain a more multi-dimensional insight into him/herself.

In summary, it is my belief that these two assessments, while measuring different things, can give both consultants and individuals a more in-depth understanding of the things that cause people to behave the way they do, as well as how they can improve in order to be more effective. Research shows that the higher self-awareness individuals have, the greater likelihood they will have an increased ability to evaluate their behavior and emotions and better understand the behavior and emotions of others. Thus, allowing them to choose actions that are going to result in more positive outcomes for all parties.

 JJudy Suiter_Competitive Edgeudy Suiter is founder and CEO of Competitive Edge, Inc. a human resources training and consulting company offering benchmarking services, candidate and personal assessments, team building and executive coaching. Please contact Judy, 770-487-6460, or visit our website at to learn more.

Webinar: Emotionally Intelligent Teams

May 2, 2014

q learning

Presented by Richard Carr, Q Learning

Register Here

Tuesday May 6  | 1 PM EST

As research and practice continue to abound in the area of Emotional Intelligence we will seek to apply some of this new knowledge into the area most critical to the success or failure of an organization – its teams and whether they work consistently well together. Have you ever wondered why some of your teams outstrip the performance of others while having people of the same professional standing or skills level?  Do you get frustrated with teams who just cannot seem to get on in the day to day work environment? Can you imagine what it would be like if your teams were equipped to make better decisions? We believe that working with EI can shed light on these issues and provide a way of getting to grips with them.
During this webinar we will pose several questions including:

  • Can EI really improve Team performance?
  • Do we really understand how our decisions are made?
  • What difference does individual/mutual accountability make?
  • How do we go about working with EI in groups?


Register today for this free, one-hour webinar

Webinar: Employee Engagement and Emotional Intelligence

April 29, 2014

Ed Hennessy

Presented by Ed Hennessy, Leadership Call, LLC

Register here

Thursday May 1 | 11 AM EST

In this webinar we’ll explore the exciting topic of emotional intelligence and how it intrinsically provides the employee a foundation to build qualities, characteristics, and behaviors that lead to greater individual engagement. We’ll look at the world’s first scientifically validated model of emotional intelligence the EQ-i 2.0 and understand how certain skills in emotional intelligence empower 4 key elements to employee engagement. The nature of Emotional Intelligence is that it is dynamic and can be developed. The development ability of emotional intelligence allows us to cultivate a plan around specific skills that ultimately results in empowered employees, greater engagement, and increased productivity.

Highlights include:

  • What is employee engagement vs employee satisfaction & current approaches considering extrinsic and intrinsic motivation
  • The Impact of Emotions – Evolution of emotional intelligence & key factors about EI, IQ, & personality
  • Engaged Employees – Qualities & Characteristics
  • The EQ-i 2.0 Model – 5 Composites and 15 Skills and the link to employee engagement
  • Connecting specific emotional intelligence skills to intrinsic elements of engagement
  • Cultivating engagement growth with an emotional intelligence development plan

Register today for this free, one-hour webinar

Webinar: Emotional Intelligence as a Catalyst: The Move from Old School to New School Leadership

March 10, 2014

David Cory_Small

Presented by Ed David Cory, EI Training Company

Thursday March 13 | 11 AM EST

Register here

The world has been stuck in a dominance paradigm since we first learned we could dominate others through force. Autocratic, authoritarian leadership depends on this paradigm of dominating others, however, the world is moving away from this dominance paradigm to a partnership paradigm in which we work more through relationships. Leadership is evolving to meet with these changes in how society relates with one another, but the skills required to partner well – emotional intelligence skills – often get overlooked. Join David Cory, leadership development specialist, as he reviews the world’s most comprehensive model of EQ and the 15 EQ competencies that make up this model.

Register today for this free, one-hour webinar

Webinar: Emotional Intelligence for Effective Leadership

February 24, 2014

Ed Hennessy

Presented by Ed Hennessy, Leadership Call LLC

Thursday March 6 | 1PM EST

Register here

Today’s fast-paced and complex business environment requires leaders who can cope more easily in stressful situations, exude confidence, and be flexible and optimistic. This webcast will explore the exciting topic of emotional intelligence (EI) and how it provides the foundation for the qualities and characteristics of an effective leader. Participants will look at the world’s first scientifically validated model of EI, the EQ-i 2.0, and understand how leadership connects to specific EI skills. The webcast also will present a plan to cultivate EI and empower one’s ability to create greater leadership effectiveness. Attendees will:

  • learn about EI, the EQ-i 2.0, and specific EI skills
  • understand the connection between leadership and EI
  • identify specific EI skills that enhance leadership effectiveness
  • create a plan to cultivate EI growth.

Register today for this free, one-hour webinar

Webinar Preparation: How’s Your Resilience Meter?

January 24, 2014

Marcia Hughes

Webinar: Managing Your Resilience Meter – A Guide to Positivity, Productivity and Well-Being

Presented by Marcia Hughes, Collaborative Growth

Wednesday January 29 | 1 PM EST

Register Here

ARTICLE: How’s Your Resilience Meter?
By Marcia Hughes

Give yourself one of the best gifts available – expand your resilience.  Sustainable behavior change is a lifestyle change, not a whim. That’s very much the truth for expanding your resilience.  Scientist and leading scholar in the field of positive psychology, Barbara Fredrickson reports that in their entire research program in resilience they found that the key active ingredient supporting those with higher resilience is positivity, which includes openness and a better ability to keep things in perspective and see the bigger picture.

A frequent challenge raised by our coaching clients relates to managing their resilience. They may talk about putting up with one challenge after another as a new program is being unveiled until they finally lose their composure.  Or the challenge may be significant personal issues that are taking so much of their energy and drawing upon their flexibility dramatically that when one more thing happens – at work, at home or anywhere they become unusually inflexible, emotional or just walk away leaving things unresolved.

Stephan (not his real name) is a good example.  Most of the time, things are fine; he can manage work and personal demands.  He has a good education, a reliable job with mid-management responsibilities, and a loving family.  Just like happens to most of us, each of these good parts have challenges.  His parents are in their 80’s and require a

lot of attention.  Recently his dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and his mom has arthritis to the point she can’t take care of him.  His teenage children need a great deal of time from him and his wife.  It’s hard, yet he keeps telling himself that in a few years it’ll be easier. For now Stephan is committed to giving his all to helping his parents, his kids, serving at his church and then there’s his job. His position has a lot of stress with it and most weeks require 45 to 50 hours of work plus his commute.  Usually he juggles

everything well enough. Then his boss informed him that the big report he and his team have worked on for two months is needed in two days instead of the two weeks they were supposed to have to complete it well.  Stephan hit the roof. He yelled at his boss, refused to meet the deadline. Told his staff to just quit and take the rest of the day off.

It wasn’t a pretty picture. That was a few weeks ago.  Stephan is working in his coaching with the aftermath of his outburst, as well as what brought him to it. Our focus includes understanding his challenges and building ways to stay in touch with his resilience meter to help guide his behavior.

Strategies for Expanding Resilience

You, just like Stephan, can choose from several strategies to expand and maintain your resilience. Six of the sixteen EQi skills particularly support resilience strength. Act now to support your health and well-being by following a resilience enhancing strategy such


  • Meditation.
  • Recognizing that you are a part of something purposeful that’s bigger than you.
    • Expanding your happiness through gratitude or embracing and valuing your connections with others.
    • Building your optimism by expecting what works to keep on happening and get even larger.
    • Embracing your Bigger Yes – by living priorities that call for time with loved ones, time to exercise, time for you – all which expand your stress tolerance capacity.
    • Perceiving yourself with healthy self-regard by being able to view your strengths, challenges, and neutral zones and feel good about who you are.
    • Exercising your emotional self-awareness by noticing your emotions, recognizing how you feel and why and continuing to call forth positive emotions.

Resilience is the ability to recover readily from illness, depression, or adversity; it’s a form of buoyancy. Fortunately, your resilience can be expanded – it’s a personal skill that may have some components of genetic predisposition but can be influenced and grown as one of your most reliable assets. However, it does require continuous upkeep.  Growing the skill requires awareness and practice. Your journey is one of developing new habits that may not only change your social and psychological take on life but may well improve your health as well.

Six Emotional Intelligence Skills

There is a strong connection between the strength of your resilience and 6 of the 16 skills measured by the EQi 2.0:  stress tolerance, emotional self-awareness, self-regard, optimism, impulse control and flexibility.

These EI skills are ones that are more self-oriented rather than other-oriented because resilience is an internal state. You’ve probably heard that you need to take care of yourself before you have the strength and resilience to take care of others well. The metaphor most call to mind readily is when oxygen is needed on an airplane you need

to put your own oxygen mask on before you start helping others. You know why – you’ll black out quickly and be a problem rather than a help if you don’t start with your mask. Life is that way as well. Though it may be easier for some to focus on the tasks, including attending to everyone else’s needs, you will be better in all ways if you start with you first – and then remember to keep prioritizing your needs!

Barbara Fredrickson

Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, author of Love 2.0 and Positivity, which I highly recommend, provides copious research on the beneficial effect of resilience and the field of positivity.

I was blessed to be taking an online training with her. She talks about changing people’s

daily diets of positivity with the goal being to change what we notice and to influence the practice of our habitual positive and negative emotions. One effective strategy she emphasizes is loving kindness meditation.  What’s different about Barbara’s work is that it primarily occurs in the laboratory – her laboratory and her joint work with many other leading scientists. The benefit of her research is she is documenting what so many coaches, trainers and others have believed to be true.

Research results by Barbara and her colleagues are documenting that there are improvements on cognitive, social, psychological and physical resources for people using certain positivity practices.  Whether you practice meditation or other resilience enhancing strategies, I encourage you to choose a practice or two from the list I provided above or another resource you have and take good care of yourself.

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